Web Zen this week has a batch of Advertising Zen links, including one to a McSweeney's post, "Scenes from the Lord of the Rings That Might Have Been Used As Setups For Bad Commercials Had the Filmmakers Not Respected the Material."
Posted by johndanseven at June 16, 2006 09:57 AMEXT. ORC CAMP, ON THE DOORSTEP OF FANGORN FOREST
ORC: I'm starving. We ain't 'ad nothin' but maggoty bread for three stinkin' days! What about them? (Indicates hobbits.) They're fresh.
URUK-HAI: They are not for eating!
ORC: What about their legs? They don't need those. Ooh—they look tasty.
URUK-HAI: They will need their legs, you scum!
ORC: Why?!
URUK-HAI: To be first in line when Gorman Mitsubishi opens its doors February 18. For one day only, they're offering up to $3,000 in dealer incentives on all 2006 models.
ORC: (Incredulous.) Even the hot new Eclipse?!
URUK-HAI: Aye.
ORC: Arghhh! What are we waiting for?!